Carol Rosetti and her drawings

This article has a whole set of illutstrations I had seen on Facebook yesterday and last night.  It's a great article related to the stereotypes of women and how they get judged by their appearances.  These things range something like, 'oh why don't you wear make-up?  You would look so much nicer with it on' to 'Ugh, you're so fat, why don't you . But there are many 'other-nesses' this illustrator, Carol Rosetti had left out: One of these is 'metallo-phobia', or the fear that heavy metal has a negative influence on people's behaviour.

In addition to some of the derogatory remarks I hear about women and sex-role stereotyping, I hear alot of negative remarks about my liking of heavy metal, some of them downright nasty, while others are are 'well-meaning' but still nevertheless 'hurtful', rude or ignorant in some other way.

For example, I get asked how I can be a fan of this music because it is 'satanic', derogatory to women and the like.

My answer to this - sexism has existed way before heavy metal has.  Satanism is not limited to heavy metal - not every person who plays dungeons and dragons, reads Harry Potter, practises Wicca etc.  I'd by asking these questions:

1. Does Anton LaVey listen to Deicide, or Alester Crowley to Mayhem or Impaled Nazarene?  Or did they listen to something more 'sedate'?
2. Does Bilal Skaff listen to Bulldozer?   Or maybe he listens to Justin Beiber?
3. Does Ted Bundy listen to Black Sabbath?   Or maybe he prefers The Beatles?
4. Or do the Anita Cobby murderers listen to Judas Priest?  

My answer to these question(s) would be: No, I don't think so (well, not that I know of) :)

Another 'well meaning' question or comment I get is 'Isn't that just a phase you're going through?'

To that, I say to others:

1. What about Elvis, Frank Sinatra, the Beatles, Tom Jones, Liberace? (to those growing up in the 1960s or prior)?
2. Wasn't Abba, Sherbert, Bay City Rollers, Sherbert a phase you were going through? (for people growing up in the 1970s)
3. Wasn't Duran Duran, Culture Club, Michael Jackson, Aha, Pseudo Echo etc some kind of a phase at the time (for those who were 1980s teenagers)?
4. And for those growing up in the 90's and beyond - Britney Spears? Back Street Boys?  Pussycat Dolls? Spice Girls?  No one asks them whether or not their fans are going through 'some kind of a phase' but will gladly assume that a Marilyn Manson fan is?
5. Or if I am feeling agreeable, I will say 'yes, it's a very *long* phase as well' (if it is a phase, that is);
6. Oh dear, I'm sorry you don't like this phase/fad/interest I have, but it's *my* phase and not yours and I will enjoy it as long as I like, as long as it's not hurting you;
7. (If the person is still 'hurt' by the music you like) - Please explain how my 'phase' as you so call it, is hurting you?  What is it about my 'phase' that makes you uncomfortable?
8. Do I expect you to stop listening to Kylie Minogue because I don't like her?  Then why do you expect me to stop listening to Judas Priest because you don't like them?

And the funniest one I heard from my Grandma, 'Oh you're such a pretty girl - how could you like such ugly people?'  (in reference to the Sex Pistols and Kiss).

My answer(s) were (and still are):

1. I was always taught not to judge a book by its cover (by my Nanna);
2. God still loves us all;
3. I'm sure God will be the judge of that;
4. I was taught not to be prejudiced;
5. I like to judge people according to how they behave (or treat me), not according to how they look;
6. Each to their own (if I do find them attractive);
7. I only hate people whose personalities are ugly;
8. I judge them according to their talent and their music, not their looks (if I'm not attracted).

To those who think the music makes me violent (or has an adverse affect on my behaviour), I'd be asking the same questions about them:

1. And you still think smacking is okay?  Do I question your taste in music when you assault me?  Perhaps Tchaikovsky is also making you violent as well?
2. You've never listened to the music yourself, but you still use swear words?  I'd like to know where you get your language (or other habits) from?
3. Who really invented the swear words?  (for instance, the word 'fuck' really means 'Fornication Under the Consent of the King', or 'shit' means 'Store High In Transit') - find out the real meanings of the swear words before using them.
4. You don't listen to it yourself, so I hate to see what you're like if you did?
5. Some of the countries with the worst human rights abuses, the most war, the most terrorism and violence, and the worst treatment of females *also* ban metal - I wonder why this is so?

And finally, there are those who accuse metalheads, punks, goths etc of poor hygeine?  If there is any truth to this statement, ask yourself why:

1. Many developing nations in India, Africa, Asia, the Middle East and Latin America countries etc have the worst levels of poverty and the poorest sanitation?  
2. And such countries and continents and regions also have, on average, much lower rates of fanship or listenership of metal, punk and alternative music than in the more developed nations (according to the statistics that I've seen; 
3. If that was the case, then we assign the 'cause and effect' relationship to factors other than listening to certain music genres.  We cut them slack because they are poor (or for some other reason).  
4. And if you don't extend such 'courtesies' such as understanding, taking other factors into account for their percieved lack of hygeine, then you are 'prejudiced' against them.
5. If you think that it is not okay to criticise other groups for lack of hygeine, but think it is okay to do so to certain people from particular subcultures for what you think is lacking in hygeine, then doesn't a hypocrite?

And what about the people who do like heavy metal, and also do the right thing?  You should be asking yourselves the following if you still think that heavy metal contributes to bad behaviour:

1. What stops them from committing crimes or misdemeanours?  Behaving badly?  
2. How do they manage to do the right thing, even in circumstances where there is wrongdoing all around them?  
3. What motivates them to look after themselves, do well in school, go to work and earn an income etc despite the odds? 
4. If this is the case, then we why don't we focus on encouraging these people to do good also, not just trying to stop them from doing wrong?

Anyway, it is nearly half past 8 in the evening so I have to get ready for work shortly, so I will have to continue in another blog entry in the near future.  See you all soon.

cheers,
Colleen

For more information on the paralell judgements I am referring to, please click on this link:  http://mic.com/articles/92651/18-empowering-illustrations-to-remind-everyone-who-s-really-in-charge-of-women-s-bodies