This article is by a teacher who not only teaches feminism and gender equity to girls, but more recently to boys. She had found that many of her male high school students are surprised to learn about 'male privelege' and 'toxic masculinity', even though they might endure racial and class inequalities.
They were surprised to hear of girls' experiences with street harassment and how 'clueless' about what girls have had to endure (eg not being able to leave the house without being 'hollered at'), and have stated that they had fears of their own - being branded as a 'fag' or a 'poof' - regardless of their own sexual orientations.
When this happens, boys miss out on learning how to 'express their masculinity in ways that are healthy, loving and emotive' (quoting from the article). This is what is known as 'toxic masculinity'.
When I read this article, I was reminded of something my brother said in his eulogy at our father's funeral. He said our father taught him 'how to be a man', and went on to say that being a man wasn't so much about being 'obviously masculine' but being a 'gentleman' - that is, treating women and other less priveleged persons with respect.
While some may feminists argue that chivalry is 'dead', I personally find nothing wrong with it. I work for an organisation where women are expected to do an equal amount of work if they are getting the same pay. However, some of my male co workers don't seem to mind helping me on the dock, and if I saw someone smaller than (and not as strong as) myself or struggling with a heavy workload, I would happily help them too (regardless of their gender). This is why I am not afraid of accepting help from others in return, even if they are men.
But, unfortunately, there is still fault on both sides - women who expect men to do the heavy work on the dock, and men who criticise women for getting equal pay and conditions and expect special treatment, but will go out and have a 'ciggie' while they expect others to cover for them. And while this workplace discrimination exists, we cannot expect the younger generation to be more 'equal' in terms of gender relations, let alone expect men to stick up for women when they are being harassed.
They were surprised to hear of girls' experiences with street harassment and how 'clueless' about what girls have had to endure (eg not being able to leave the house without being 'hollered at'), and have stated that they had fears of their own - being branded as a 'fag' or a 'poof' - regardless of their own sexual orientations.
When this happens, boys miss out on learning how to 'express their masculinity in ways that are healthy, loving and emotive' (quoting from the article). This is what is known as 'toxic masculinity'.
When I read this article, I was reminded of something my brother said in his eulogy at our father's funeral. He said our father taught him 'how to be a man', and went on to say that being a man wasn't so much about being 'obviously masculine' but being a 'gentleman' - that is, treating women and other less priveleged persons with respect.
While some may feminists argue that chivalry is 'dead', I personally find nothing wrong with it. I work for an organisation where women are expected to do an equal amount of work if they are getting the same pay. However, some of my male co workers don't seem to mind helping me on the dock, and if I saw someone smaller than (and not as strong as) myself or struggling with a heavy workload, I would happily help them too (regardless of their gender). This is why I am not afraid of accepting help from others in return, even if they are men.
But, unfortunately, there is still fault on both sides - women who expect men to do the heavy work on the dock, and men who criticise women for getting equal pay and conditions and expect special treatment, but will go out and have a 'ciggie' while they expect others to cover for them. And while this workplace discrimination exists, we cannot expect the younger generation to be more 'equal' in terms of gender relations, let alone expect men to stick up for women when they are being harassed.
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What is your own take on this situation? How do you rise above the rot?